Monthly Archives: June 2013

Fun with Barbie! Learning Societal Norms.


Gather ’round, kids!  Time to learn how to schedule a baby!!!  Today Barbie will teach you all about childbirth and social norms.  See how we can open her belly so you can see the baby?  The doctors at the hospital do that too.  Those doctors are called surgeons.  Surgeons can cut a little pouch open…like a kangaroo! Then the surgeon can pull out the baby through Mommy’s new kangaroo pouch.  They will have to close it back, though…in case Mommy has another baby later…then the chances of the pouch being used again are almost 100% because any future babies in Mommy’s belly will cause her to be considered “high risk.”  That means that Mommy will need lots of help delivering the baby from the doctor and the surgeon when the next baby comes.

You will have to help Barbie get the baby out, though.  You can be the surgeon!  Just give the curled up baby a little tug and help Barbie deliver the baby!  You did it!!!!  Now put Barbie’s belly back on!

I bet Barbie would like to have her flat stomach back, now.  No biggie!…she can just go back to visit another surgeon later and have him take some of her large baby belly off.  Don’t worry, it won’t hurt.  Barbie will have taken lots and lots of medicine!  She won’t feel a thing! 😉

Apparently Barbie can even feel forced into a C-section.  Way to teach girls how that baby is gonna have a 30% chance to come out if birthed at a hospital, Mattel!

Child Birth Barbie

Childbirth barbie has a detachable magnetic stomach that allows for an easy birth. The curled-up baby pops out when her belly is opened.

Looks like it was a pretty painless process for Barbie, though… Ken looks like he’s pretty cool about her choice of belly removal vs. vaginal delivery.  Oops!  I said Vagina.

One mother in three now gives birth by cesarean section.
  That’s about 33% of Mothers.

Most mothers are healthy and have good reason to anticipate uncomplicated childbirth. Cesarean section is major surgery and increases the likelihood of many short- and longer-term adverse effects for mothers and babies.  Source:



For those interested in listening to a recently uploaded Podcast with “Monstaa of Doom”, follow this link!

The interview includes commentary from Ibrahim [Monstaa666], William Hunter Duncan [WHD] (Blog: Off the Grid in Minneapolis and myself [GypsyMama].  With discussion of “The Birth of Two Sons:  Part 1”, my first birthing experience and how it fits in to the pattern of societal control as offered through the hospital system.

Now available for FREE download!

Fire, Feminism and Collapse Follow-Up

Gail Zawacki (Wit’s End Author) has responded to these blog posts over at the Diner!  Read her side of the story here:

No responses from Orlov…yet! 😉

Join the diner & share your thoughts! ;)



I once owned “Horton Hears a Who” as a child (VHS, baby!) It was a short at the beginning of the full length movie, “The Grinch Who Stole Christmas.” As an adult, I can still remember most of the words and song lyrics.   I can also now deduct more meaning from the message of the film.  Hope you enjoy my interpretation as of late.  Amazing how everything around you can begin to change when you look at it through new eyes.

In this tale, the voice of ONE made a difference in minds of many.  A single uttering of “YOPP!” opened the minds of the outside culture.  A culture so thick in believing that the world they lived in did not need to change.  A culture who were blindly comfortable with the way things are.  They believed that this way was the ONLY way…that anyone who tried to change the status quo beliefs of their system should be shunned, deemed insane and be forced to abide and submit…or else face persecution and mental torture.  Sound familiar?

I am currently becoming fond of a group of individuals who see our society through the eyes of Horton.  Different.  Clearly. They see a problem with the structure of things.  They feel the need to share with those around them that there is more to see, if you can only open your eyes and ears.  If you can essentially “WAKE UP”…If you can “YOPP!” Some of the members of the forum I have joined are not nearly as reserved as Horton.  😉 Nevertheless, we are all commonly trying to find a way to exist among the Whos.  (I like to call the un-awakened whos, “sheeple”–I first heard this term used by my husband and found it appropriate for everyday use).

Horton and the Whos:  Doomers and the Sheeple

Essentially, I see myself and other like minded folks (including the group I mentioned) as the “Hortons.”  Gathered together as many different levels of Horton, we believe that our current way of life in America, our industrial civilization, cannot continue along its current path.  We abbreviate the way things are now as “BAU” (Business As Usual).  In America, our BAU consists of dependence on oil and petroleum products.  Oil and Petroleum are limited resources.  We have stupidly built our entire way of life around the NECESSITY of these products.  Driving our cars, running our air conditioning, running our programed mouths, outsourcing our food supply, unwrapping our plastic products from their plastic containers…I could go on and on. (Google “Peak Oil” and prepare to read the Whos’ disapproving comments) OR  watch THIS.  We are also so spoiled to the gift that the Industrial Revolution handed to us (easily accessible everything), that we have lost the knowledge that our forefathers used to survive off the land.  If you handed most US citizens a bag of dried rice they wouldn’t know how to cook it without a microwave.  Americans are spoiled, spoiled, SPOILED when it comes to food products.  They’re also oblivious to the harmful petropesticides that are coated in thick layers all over those food products.  Most of them don’t CARE to know.  BAU= will be short lived.

Horton, the main character of the movie has a large presence…but doesn’t impress this upon his fellow members of the jungle.  He doesn’t go around romping and stomping and shouting his beliefs.  He actually comes across as humble, polite and withdrawn.  Horton has just discovered that something exists he must accept.   In the movie, it’s a dust speck on a clover.  In our reality, it is the collapse of the industrial civilization as we know it.

Horton, upon learning the truth about this dust speck, puts himself into a situational dilemma.  He feels obligated to save the speck’s mostly clueless inhabitants (The Whos).  Often unseen and unheard, this speck of dust is, at the beginning of the movie, filled with inhabitants that believe that THEIR way of life is the only way.  That there can’t possibly be anything more than what they see.  That BAU is alllll good….so why change?  Why believe in crazy theories from a grey haired scientist (Doctor Whovee).  Doctor Whovee has built a scientific structure he calls his “Who Who Scope” in an attempt to prove his theory that there is more to their world, more they could pay attention to and accept, if they could only BELIEVE.  We’ll call Doctor Whovee the DOOMER of the story.

When the Whos are awakened by the CRASH of the black bottomed eagle dropping their speck of dust into a clover patch (when the sheeple WAKE UP to how the world has turned and where it is headed), they suddenly trust in the beliefs of the educated Doomer, Doctor Whovee.  This is the severity of what I believe will need to happen for the majority of Americans to be able to see the future of our world as I do (umm…FUCKED UP!).  What will it take to wake everyone up? …To make them see?  I think that the easiest way will be the depletion of gasoline.  No one will be able to drive their cars… Simple enough to cause mass chaos.  The trucks that deliver our food will park = no food in the grocery stores, producing PANIC. Perhaps we will lose power for a long period of time…NO AIR CONDITIONING?  STRESS.  It will truly take an Earth/Clover shattering SHAKE to get some of the sheeple I have encountered to see that we cannot have infinite growth on a finite planet.

And we’ll have to get past The Wickersham Brothers too:

We’re the Wickersham Brothers.
We’re vigilant spotters.
Hot shot spotters of rotters and plotters.
And we’re going to save our sons and our daughters from you.
You’re a dastardly, ghastardly, shnasterdly, schnook,
Trying to brainwash our brains,
With this gobbledy gook.
We know what you’re up to pal.
You’re trying to shatter our morale.
You’re trying to stir up discontent.
And seize the reigns of government.
You’re trying to throw sand in our eyes.
You’re trying to kill free enterprise.
And raise the cost of figs and dates,
And wreck our compound interest rates.
And shut our schools,
And steal our jewels,
And even change our football rules.
Take away our garden tools,
And lock us up in vestibules.

These darkened monkeys scared me a bit as a child.  I didn’t really understand the lyrics of their song, but I liked repeating the big words.  As an adult, I see this acrobatic trio as the voice of media, Corporations, big money, the strong arm of the law, The  MAN.  Essentially, you could compare them to any of the entities that tell us BAU is all good, and it would make sense to me.  I hear doublethink, fear, greed, and coverup in their song now.  They are fearful of the truth and are doing all they can to keep the jungle creatures COOL and focused on carrying on with their daily lives…lives covered in an invisible gossamer curtain of programming.

So how does one begin to see a Children’s movie in this light?  It is my process of acceptance.  Did Dr. Seuss intend these messages to be interpreted this way?  I suppose we all interpret things as we want to see them.

I have just stepped onto the clover, I suppose.  I’m only now becoming one of the many shouting “WE ARE HERE!”

Messsage from a doomer newbie.


The past few posts have allowed me to take myself out of my element.  I am new to being awake to the idea that our industrial civilization cannot continue along its current path.  I’ve watched a few documentaries, read a few blogs, joined a doomer forum and had a few talks around the fire pit.  I’m a newbie.

As I continue to grow in knowledge, I’m hopeful that my blog posts will also begin to shape and form themselves into reading material for those who have also awakened to this idea.  For now, however, I’m going to take along any readers who wish to join me on my journey of acceptance.

I’m entering the infancy stages of living in an age of collapse.  I’m no expert.  I fully expect to be questioned about my beliefs.  I hope to continue to entertain any thoughts presented to me through written response.

Today I renamed my blog’s header tag line from “A Journal Salad” to “Finding beauty in preparing for the future.”  I think this is now a better description of what this blog has become for me.  Before, I just wanted a place to unleash and store my ramblings…but now, I have something to say.  I have beauty to share, experiences to create and my self to discover.  I’m all buckled up.

Here we go!

Fire, Feminism and Collapse: Part 2


Time to continue the bottle slingin’

Upon first glance at Gail’s blog Wit’s End, I connect with the sense of artistry that we seem to share.  She posts many images to her blog, all designed to help her share her thoughts both visually and textually.  I’ve always been one to visualize my thoughts and am most clearly a visual learner.  She also posts many images of (and in) nature…which I also connect to.  I feel the most spiritual when I am surrounded by nature.

I suppose it makes sense that I can connect to a female author’s blog much faster than a male blogger’s corner of the net.  However, upon inspection, there are a few less welcoming aspects to Club Orlov.  Orlov’s blog typically has one or two images per post. (The Age of Limits post being an exception)  His written word is shrunk by the banner of self promotion that careens down the right side of the screen. (Can’t blame the guy for trying to make some cash off of his readership, I guess).

Also…I don’t really understand the premise of naming your blog “club *insert author’s last name*.”  This can easily come across as a bit egotistical…but maybe I am just not seeing the entire picture here.  I mean…I DID just read the guy’s blog for the first time yesterday.

It should also be noted that I respect both authors for what they are attempting to do in the doomer community.  Spread the word, share their knowledge, give us some fair warning…all that.  I have just heard about Gail because of the debate I’m discussing in both this blog and the last (good thing there was a debate so that I could learn about her, right?), but I have been aware of the name “Dimitry Orlov” for a few years now.  My husband (author of Epiphany Now) has been following Orlov and his blog for years.  He owns most (if not all) of his books.  He respects the guy, and feels that he is an intelligent voice to listen to.

Anyhow, I’m writing not to belittle the knowledge and authorship of both Club Orlov and Wit’s End…but to instead give a “newbie’s” interpretation of both authors and their messages, while also chiming in about the bit of rivalry that has seemingly arisen between them.

Onward to my response of Gail’s written word and visual stimuli:

I’ve obviously been on a “Mothering” kick, as you can see in the past few blog posts.  Our second son is three weeks old today…so I suppose I have good reason to be bursting with nurture.

Gail seems to be focused on nurturing Mother Earth and protecting our throne (Nature/our shared planet) throughout her blog.  When first reading Orlov’s comment about Gail being a part of the 1% via an SUV escorted tour of dead leaves…I was intrigued to find out what the hell he was talking about. Gail is highly concerned about trees dying from pollution and climate collapse in general.  Valid concerns.  Any one who understands that our bodies need to breathe oxygen to survive should be concerned about the future of our trees, at least.  So…after reading both sides of the attack, I find Orlov’s jab and comment poke about “dead leaves” to be a bit callused.

“To be able to criticize, one must first rise above that which you wish to criticize.”- Orlov

I will state, however, that I’m not sure that all of the photos of trees and leaves that Gail posted on her blog are proof of her theory.  I’m no expert in horticulture, but I’d guess that poor soil conditions might cause some of the fallen leaves, maybe even some of the disfigured, withered leaves to appear.  Now, are poor soil conditions a part of the Earth’s dangerous CO2 levels that she speaks of?  I’m not sure…but I’m skeptical.  Maybe the trees she photographed were affected by all of the vehicles pulling up into their habitat to attend the conference?  Perhaps they didn’t care for the burnt petroleum coming from their tail pipes?  Just sayin’…I’m curious.

My curiosity led me to this article about Maple Tree Decline, in particular.  Looks like I’ve got a point?  (any correction or input is appreciated).  Although I assume Gail was photographing leaves surrounding the Age of Limits Conference and not an Urban area, there is still an argument to be made about the affect of vehicles invading the habitat of these photographed trees?  I’m still unsure…she did mention that all different species of trees were affected.  Hmm…

Overall, I applaud Gail’s concern for nature and the dying trees and plants who are a part of it (I’m a plant lover, myself).  I seem to notice that Males (especially male doomers) are more focused on the political spectrum of collapse study and debate.  So there’s some basic male vs. female generalization for ya.

I admire both Orlov and Gail in their ability to share their belief systems openly.  I’m just saddened to see the battle of words slung around like the wet mop used to clean up the alcoholic spillage off the bar floor after the roadhouse romp has been played out.

The beauty of free thinking and free speech, as especially pertaining to the written word, is that we can all focus on the things that concern us most.  We can be passionate about these topics…but we cannot belittle those who are focused on a topic that we don’t care to pay as much attention to.  That is, we can’t make fun of someone for being hellbent on saving the bees when our own belief system says that we are facing a much larger problem, say…human extinction. (Which I haven’t really researched into and at the moment, don’t really believe is a possibility within my lifetime or the lifetime of my children).

In short, don’t poke at someone’s belief system as related to the big picture of what we should be concerned about in this world.  Just be glad that they are showing concern about important issues that surround us.  They could just be concerned about making sure their football team beats their rivals, and nothing else.  Football being a topic that I could give…maybe a pinched off shit about.  Football= the little picture.

Once Gail began describing her visit to the Age of Limits conference, I instantly connected with her reasoning for attending such an event.  Aaron and I wished that we could have attended the conference, wholeheartedly, however unrealistic and ambitious that wish may have been (I had just given birth at the time of the conference).

Being a 30-something child of the 80’s…I don’t find may people my age with whom I can connect with when it comes to my belief system of how I think the access to infinite resources will end.  I’m still in the early stages of acceptance when it comes to understanding that collapse is coming.  I’m not sure if I’d be able to give an educated opinion about how fast I believe said collapse will arrive…but I sure as Hell believe it is coming.


The infancy of acceptance.

I am at the stage of understanding, as of late, in which I’m beginning to expand my reading coverage of the topic of collapse.  Before, I was just prepper hoarding useful materials that could be helpful to us when collapse hit: seeds, mason jars, needle and thread, gardening and cooking know-how.  But still, no matter how deep I am into my collapse infancy beliefs, when I read Gail’s words, “No matter how peacefully collapse is internalized, it’s really lonely if you know hardly anybody else who shares that perspective.”  I understood.  I had felt the emotion of those words before.

I also felt hope for acceptance after reading this paragraph:  “I approached the weekend as a watershed event in my own personal journey towards reconciling with the irreversible and unavoidable morass that characterizes our foolish predicament.  After five years since learning about the converging catastrophes that loom in our future (indeed have already begun), I am ready to move past grief, past attempts to persuade, and on to calm acceptance…and finding something worthwhile to do with the time that remains other than track the path of decline.  It was refreshing to find it’s possible to share bemused laughter at our intractable conundrum.”

Hopefully, with the support of my partner and online community, I will be able to get to the stage of true acceptance much quicker than 5 years from now… 😉  I’m thankful for those who have lived this process of awakening before me!  It helps me move along through the process much more fluidly than it was for the early doomers before me.  I’d imagine there is much more information out there for the new batch of Neos than there may have been before the “green” movement.

Further into reading, I saw that Dimitri Orlov’s speech was not the only one criticized by gender issues from the members of the crowd.  Apparently Carolyn Baker was also approached by issues.  She told a fable of a wife who practiced getting close to a tiger to help her husband overcome his PTSD rage after returning from war.

There were a few women who looked at the story from the perspective of the tiger…who they felt was abandoned and neglected of trust after the wife had achieved her goal of attaining a whisker.  A strange perspective on the overall message of the story…  I feel that the tiger in the story, if it felt any form of loss…was probably more upset that it wasn’t getting fed every day vs. depressed about being abandoned.  I doubt that it felt betrayed.  I think it might probably be more on the HUNGRY side 🙂  I also feel as if the women who made this comment MIGHT possibly be animal rights activists…who are a little on the extreme side of their support of animal preservation?  Are we preserving the feelings of animals now…I mean, since we know what they are thinking and how they feel and all?  Sure…the tiger may very likely go through a bit of depression after the story’s wife stops coming to him daily.  But…how do we not know, without being a Dr. Doolittle, that he tiger was depressed because he missed the juicy tenderloins he’d been gobbling up over the past few months?


Then there was a point made by a few women in the audience who complained of the apparent weight put on the story’s wife to perform the role of nurturer because this husband had made the decision to go to war.  This husband, they complained, was putting undue pressure onto his wife by choosing to go to war in the first place…making the wife the victim of the actions of her husband and the PTSD he’d been afflicted with while at war.

Well, well well…could these women have possibly been married in the past?  I find this doubtful.  In my opinion, a husband and wife are a TEAM.  Surely the wife and husband discussed the man’s decision to go to war in the first place, right?  I mean…did he just come home one day and say, “Hey honey, pack your shit, we’re moving!  Oh, and… I’m headed off to war!  Hang in there while living alone!  I don’t care what you think about my decision.  Peace, woman!”


Here, one might argue that perhaps the husband in the story was a member of the armed forces, and that he HAD to go to war.  Perhaps the decision for him to go to war had been made for him by his superior officers and the Department of Defense.  But still, my point remains…didn’t the husband and wife discuss his decision to become an active member of the forces in the first place?  Think they might have made that decision together?  A good husband and wife would.  A healthy husband and wife always communicate their true feelings and thoughts when an important decision is made that involves both of their futures.  Because I feel this way, I find the audience members response to the topic of “it was the man’s decision to go to war” pretty flippin’ ridiculous and downright annoyingly feminist.  In fact, it is this sort of logic that makes the word “feminist” pretty close to a slur in the minds of many.

Enter our adversary, Dimitry Orlov, and his presentation on communities.  Orlov’s question and answer session was RIPE for some feminist fueled debate.  Carolyn Baker’s presentation seemed to get the estrogen protection flowing…so when Dimitry spoke of communities that were patriarchal and known to carry histories of abuse among their community members…a wildfire was sure to erupt once the comments were welcomed.

Orlov’s mistake of mentioning an Amish “gunshot wound” inside a discussion involving all things domestic violence really got them going.  So, when he continued into his question and answer session by discussing how Russian women believe that feminism is a failed experiment in the west…and then carried on even further to claim that the Pussy Riot women were idiots (which he may have stated to try to get a quick laugh?)…it is no wonder that the women hung around after the speech to shoot eye darts at him in their firing circle.  Mr. Orlov should have spoke before Ms. Baker, I guess.  At least the attackers aren’t sexually racist when it comes to picking their targets, right?

To the speakers’ defense, it must be fearfully difficult to answer any question appropriately among a group of highly passionate doomers.  For instance, “Hey Dimitry!  You’re facing animal rights, freedom of speech and PTSD…Fuck one, Marry one, Kill one…annnnnnnd…. GO!”

Looks like this bar fight between Gail and Orlov, as seen in their blog comments, may have started up just before “last call for alcohol.”  That roadhouse was, again….RIPE for a fight!



One thing that I have truly noticed, being new to the idea of collapse, is that those who are “aware” are also passionate.  They are, in fact, usually passionate about more than one basic issue, too.  I suppose it makes sense that when you are of the opinion that the entire structure for which our society is based on is set up to fail, you might want to be informed and loaded with mounds of facts to back up your claim.  This requires one to be passionate about their belief.  If you have researched the idea that our industrial civilization is eventually going to regress or cease to exist…and STILL believe that it will after said researching process…you know what he hell you’re talking about.  You are PASSIONATE, downright LUSTFUL about your beliefs.


passion flower

Passion Flower

Passion (from the Latin verb patī meaning to suffer) is a term applied to a very strong feeling about a person or thing. Passion is an intense emotion compelling feeling, enthusiasm, or desire for something.

The term is also often applied to a lively or eager interest in or admiration for a proposal, cause, or activity


(yes…I keep using Wikipedia references…which, I am aware can be altered by just about anyone with a brain…but when I use these references, I agree with their definitions)

Note this particular Wiki definition’s Latin root:  “Pati:  meaning– TO SUFFER” Well, well,welllll…there we have it, doomers.   We have gotten so deep into our beliefs, so deep into acquiring the TRUTH, that is, that we are destined to become passionate about said beliefs and are therefore, destined to SUFFER for them.

Sadly, this suffering will include arguments between not only those who have not yet been awakened to the truth, but also among our fellow believers…our DOOMER COMMUNITY.  Let’s try to remember this the next time one of the main passionate speakers in our community has the balls to get up in front of a group of OTHER suffering, open eyed, open eared sponges to give their thoughts and emotions about topics that we all agree upon.

Can’t we all just be tolerant of each others opinions?  Time to ban together, put down the broken bottles and help clean up the mess, folks.  Let’s just all go have some coffee, eat a little fruit, over at The Diner and talk it out like adults.

passion fruit

Passion Fruit

Beyond the Silencing Moon


Listening for those slow, sweet little breaths.

The silencing stare for movement.

The sigh of relief.

The snotty nosed snort.

This is the helpless routine my worry instigates with my newborn, Harper.

Ayden’s sweetest sayings at the moment…just days before his third birthday include:

“The sun’s goin’ to beeeeed.” just before sunset


“I wake up.  The sun wake up toooooo.  You wake up? (confirmation required) You wake up Tooooooo!”

EVERY morning.  🙂

I love my boys beyond the moon…

They make my heart enlarge with love…even before the hours of sunrise.

I will forever encourage you to live inside every moment.