Estrogen Testosterone Soup: Ingredients only a cauldron can hold?

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I’m writing to respond to a conversation/borderline dispute that is going on over at The Doomstead Diner. The discussion of the term, “Feminazi”

Many opinions have been spouted over at The DD about the usage of this term. I’ve skimmed over a few. I’ve written my own response with minimal reading of others opinions, because I wanted to make sure that my own opinion of the word shined through my writing, without the bias of having read the opinion of others’ responses.

First of all, through my understanding, the word “Feminazi” is a combination of the words “feminist” and “Nazi.” BOTH of these words are touchy topics to write about. Feminism has many facets. I have not studied much about the liberation of Women. Perhaps that is something that I SHOULD know more about as a woman. I should know how I’m able to be free to have the same rights as the male species. I should know more about the struggles of women in the past. I should, but I don’t. I believe that this may be explained, minimally, by the fact that I have never had to feel repressed, looked down upon, or downtrodden just because I’m a female. I have not felt the need to take to the streets to fight for my right to be a person of equal rights. My life, at my age of 33, has not been affected by such matters.

The closest that I can relate to this issue is easily found through my experience with a hospital birth vs. a birth within a birthing center using a midwife. The hospital’s treatment toward me, their “customer” opened my eyes to how sad it is that the system fails us (women) when it comes to the birthing process.

I made a fleeting comment to the gallant Surly, for him not to be “butt hurt” about a drawing that I sketched out while snickering about dick and ball jokes written all in fun by the strong population of male form members at The Diner. I enjoy crude humor. Dick and ball jokes? Laughable. Most of the time I can stomach it: jokes about spunk? Nope…I’m outta that conversation, thank you. I find myself able to overlook circumstances in which men make jokes about women. It’s easy to feed those jokes backward into a reverse pattern, but why? Overall, this is something that the wrong type of feminist is unable to overlook, IMO.

There are three types of feminists that I have separated in my mind.

Feminist Type A: Has studied the journey that women have been on over the centuries. Knows the history of repression that females have fought through in the past. This feminist fights for, and will continue to fight for, the right for Women and Men to be treated equally, no matter the circumstance. Can accept and defend against sexually racist statements without getting too defensive or angry.

Feminst Type B: Has all of the abilities and knowledge of Feminist Type A, yet is unable to laugh at jokes poking fun at their specific internal reproductive organs. Takes offense easily to PMS jokes, but can throw backlash out in the form of television remote handling and other male centered comebacks. Type B is one sided. Females can poke fun at males: OKAY! Males poking fun at females? NOT okay. Not okay, indeed.

Feminist Type C: Has a distrust and overall dislike for the male species. Most of the time, this form of Feminist gets easily offended and borderline angry when a man makes a comment about a woman. Often, their understanding of said comment is twisted out of proportion.

Through the interaction with the men I’ve had in my life (friends, mostly), I’ve come to understand that most men don’t have a problem making jokes about body parts. After all, men were all, at one time, boys. I don’t have much of a problem with that myself. Boys have a penis. Girls have a vagina. We are different and unique. We each fill a position in the human population necessary to continue said population. Joke as we might about PMS and high testosterone levels…we are what we are.

Mix in the fact that we all also have our own belief systems and personalities, and you’ve got a complicated mixture, for sure. Overall, we are each our own. Sometimes we’ll step on each others toes. Sometimes a male might say something that can push the wrong button in a female. Vice Versa. But whoa…swirl the testosterone and estrogen hormones into the wrong mix, at the wrong speed, or at the wrong time, and you’ve got an INSTA BATTLE soup de jour. Might as well throw your soup into a blender.

Some male and female ingredients aren’t going to taste well together. Period. (no pun intended) I don’t see much reason in attempting to make all of the worlds spices compliment each other. There are far too many psychological, environmental (and otherwise) personality traits involved with simply being human. Breaking ourselves down into male vs. female without considering personality will instantly set you up for an argument. I write this to explain: just because I’m a female doesn’t mean that I’ll always take the side of a feminist response to an argument.

We are creatures of not only our sexuality, but also of our past, our environments, our upbringing, our experiences. Simply put: Men, Women…respect the ingredients mixed into the soup. Communicate your feelings and thoughts on how to make the soup be more palatable for conversation. Tell someone when you think they’ve poisoned the soup. Wait for the soup to cool off. Try not to stir the pot too much.

The short version to understanding my thoughts:

1.Telling me I can’t do something you can because I have different reproductive organs: NOT okay. Okay, I can’t ejaculate or pee standing up (not gracefully, anyway) …but otherwise…not okay 😉

2.Believing that you are more of a person than I am because we carry different body parts: NOT okay.

3.Believing that you are owed special treatment as a Woman because of the Women’s Suffrage of our past is…well…kinda stupid. Get with the times. I’m sure our ancestors would tell you the same. Guess what? We’ve won most of the battle. Move on. Bask in the delight that we are living in different times, where the struggles and voices of the Women of our past have made great changes for us in the present. By dwelling on the past, you are allowing yourself to experience unnecessary distress. Be happy with the advancements.

#2 on that list brings in the term “Nazi.” From my understanding, The infamous Nazis of Hitler’s following believed in one master race. They believed that one skin color WAS more important than the other…to the extent that they believed in exterminating anyone who did not fit their belief of master race.

Overall, the term “Nazi” included into “Feminazi” is what makes it such a horrible term. It’s really a slang word that shouldn’t be used lightly. It deserves to be criticized. It should not be used loosely.
In my opinion, using a term like that loosely is like pissing on the graves of all of those who died because of one man’s psychotic and manipulative dictatorship. It is like shaking hands with all of those who were brainwashed into following such a belief. One master race. How ugly is that? Who was Hitler to decide the elite race? Who are feminazis to do the same?

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2 responses »

  1. Wendy,
    To me, friend, here is the heart of the matter:

    “I have not studied much about the liberation of Women. Perhaps that is something that I SHOULD know more about as a woman. I should know how I’m able to be free to have the same rights as the male species. I should know more about the struggles of women in the past. I should, but I don’t. I believe that this may be explained, minimally, by the fact that I have never had to feel repressed, looked down upon, or downtrodden just because I’m a female. I have not felt the need to take to the streets to fight for my right to be a person of equal rights. My life, at my age of 33, has not been affected by such matters.”

    We notice a similar attitude in my daughter and her nieces, who are about your age. You accept– expect– equal treatment as your birthright. You have never had to fight for it. As a parent, I am grateful for that. What you have’t seen and may not consider is what it took to get here.
    Both Contrary and I have LIVED through this. A generation of women had to agitate, lobby and press for equal treatment for several decades, press for laws, go to court, demonstrate and otherwise make themselves obnoxious just to reach the precarious state of gender equity we currently enjoy. I am glad you don’t have to fight for that. But you might do well to learn a little more about it.

    Equal treatment under the law is quite a different matter from what happens inside relationships. Ultimately, men and women are different, and the best relationships grow with trust and mutual respect. I’ve got that, and it sounds like you do as well…

    Keep up the good work.

    Like

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